Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Attack of the Dawn Doll

     So, this morning, I'm minding my own business, running to Target to return one of Abby's less successful shirt choices, pick up a pencil sharpener, find jeans for Sam, and get Klondike bars.  It was a perfectly productive morning, and I was heading out of the store, and there she was.  The woman who, two years ago, asked if I was pregnant, when I most certainly was not.  Oh, Lord, help me now.  She even called my name to get my attention.  Can't I just let a bad bygone fat day be a bad bygone fat day??     We engaged in the small talk, the chit-chat, the "how's school, how are the kids, blah, blah, blah" but the whole time, I'm seeing us reflected in the Target window.  And here's what I'm thinking.  "She's no bigger than a Dawn doll, and why is she attacking me?"  All chit-chat aside, I'm sure the undertone of the whole conversation was, "we both know what you did, and now here we are."  Does anyone else remember what a Dawn doll looks like?  About one-third the size of a Barbie, way smaller then Skipper, the oft-forgotten sister.  And that is exactly the size of this woman.  http://dawndollworld.com/photo_album.htmlLike a pocket Barbie.  I could technically put this woman in my pocket if I needed to.  I checked myself out in the window, covertly.  Hair? Fine.  White v-necked tee?  Good.  Boobs?  Good.  But ohmygod there is a giant, aqua, bulky fleece tied around my waist and I look like I'm wearing a fuzzy life preserver.   I wanted to scream in the middle of our conversation, "I took a 2 mile walk this morning and it was 50 degrees when I left and it's almost 70 now!" or maybe "there's no baby in here!" but I didn't.  I just made a silent, solemn pledge to stop tying sweatshirts around my waist.    
     I'm disappointed that the Dawn doll got the best of me.  I should have just offered her a Klondike and been on my way.  


  1. Looky what blog I found!
    Related experience.
    I was big screen HI Def TV shopping a couple weeks ago with Sue's sister. (Required both my Bro-in-law and myself to help, or maybe that was our perception. Fodder for other comments?)

    While discussing with Barbara the relative features of a couple units, the sales rep said that the grandchildren might like the gaming results from the higher refresh rate on the top of the line unit. Barbara quietly mentioned that she has a 12 year old daughter only. Don't think it even registered, but we did leave and attempt to get a better deal at Best Buy, only to return because it was still the best deal.
    Some people are soooo stupid. I hope she's not on commission (thoughts of a scene in Pretty Woman - that's between us BTW)

  2. Rick. . . I love that you always find me and read my stuff :) You awesome wonderful Canadian.
    Nice related story, BTW. Really, people. Get a CLUE.
    xxxooo love and kisses to all, please. Hope the house is good. Thinking we better get our passports in order, yes?

  3. Yes, get your weekends and passports in order. As I think it was decent of us to up and move two hours closer to the border just to be near to you, the least you can do is come and visit. We'll have to see the new picket fence another time.
    Hopefully calendars will be a little more free post-baseball season (?) We have a scary fall season...touring universities. Indeed, your little "charge" is applying for colleges this year.
    Believe it!
    Canuck love all round.